Saturday, December 19, 2009

Love or Friendship -how do you know?

My neice asked: How do I know if a guy is a really good friend or someone I really like?

She said twice friends had crushes on her and it didn't work out because she didn't like them as much. And now she's thinks she likes someone and she doesn't want the same thing to happen again. (She doesn't know if he likes her)

I had to take myself back YEARS! But, even after all this time, I remember how gut wrenching it is. Being a teen isn't easy. HS life is confusing. These problems tie your stomach up in knots!!!

I wanted to help her be calm and also tell her the truth.

The best answer I came up with is this:

When someone is your friend, you want them to be happy, no matter what. So if your guy friend really likes another girl and they get together you are totally happy for him. If you really like someone, you are crushed to think of them with someone else -it makes your blood boil and your fists clench. So, close your eyes and think of this guy. Now imagine he's with another girl.

She did it.

Her response. "Oh, !@#* I do like him."

19 comments:

  1. OMG, that s so awesome that she can come to you like that. I hope when my kids are older they feel like they can talk to me openly about things like that. Oh, and that was an awesome way to help her figure out how she really felt about the boy.

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  2. Thanks MHM! As far as talking to me; she knows I'm always here but she doesn't always take me up on it! I'm glad she did this time.

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  3. After making love with the person 20 times or so, you'll really get a feel for the answer.

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  4. That is a good system! My system was easier. If I asked them out and they laughed in my face, then they were probably just friends! hahaha!

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  5. secretia - I didn't suggest that!

    Otin - you have it all figured out!

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  6. Good advice to her on how to figure out if it's love or friendship. I hope to have that relationship with my nieces as they grow up.

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  7. I love your answer. It's perfect.

    Hugs!!

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  8. So THAT'S how you tell!!! Dangit - wish I had asked you first. :)

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  9. Thanks everyone....
    Yeah slacker-chick just ask me next time....ha!Or you can take secretia's advice!

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  10. Haha, excellent advice.

    I'm still working on that myself. I suck quite a bit at telling the difference and then end up annoying myself and pissing off the dude in the process.

    I never learn the first time...

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  11. One more thing....I've given you an award! Stop by and pick it up!

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  12. Glad ur learning, Sara! I agree it isn't always easy to figure out!

    Cathy, thank you thank you thank you, I'll check it out!

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  13. Very insightful response. She's lucky to have you as an aunt.

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  14. What a great way to put yourself in her shoes! Hmmm....does it work for spouses? KIDDING! :)

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  15. Ho Ho Ho!! Merry Christmas!! From me and my buddy Otin

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  16. HAHAH!! I do like your answer...but I LOVE her response!!!!

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